Religulous

I just sat down and watched 'Religulous', the movie with Bill Maher. I consider myself lucky that Netflix was able to get it to me the first day it came out on DVD. I am grateful to them.


It's a good movie, and it makes (at least) a couple of very valid points. One is that there are many people who do many incredible things in the name of religion. Another is that there are a great number of people in this world who seem to think that the pursuit of (probably nuclear) Armageddon is somehow justified in the advancement of their religious ideology. Maher, at the end of the movie, brings this point home with a bang. Literally.


He makes his point in a way that is sure to infuriate the faithful. One of the first things you notice is that his documentarial (if that's a word) methodology is confrontational. He enters the movie with the pretext that religious fanatics are severely delusional, and he isn't afraid to gather groups of religious people together, and then either constantly interrupt their answers to his questions (ala Chris Matthews), or to harass them outright. His audacity is impressive, but if I try that I tend to get beaten up. Anyway, a lot of this is meant to be put in a humorous context, but that's really left up to the viewer. You'll get out of this movie what you come into it with. I personally didn't think it was that thigh-slapping hilarious, mostly because the subject matter is, to me, pretty serious stuff.


There are other ways to make one's point when dealing with opposing ideologies. One of my personal favorites is to assume as much of a non-threatening air as I can (assuming of course I am actually capable of doing this - some people don't think I am). I call this the 'Give 'em enough rope' philosophy, named after that early Clash record. Let them go long enough, they'll hang themselves. Of course, that means I have to stifle any of my own opinions, which could be construed as a form of lying or manipulating my subjects. It's unclear how much of this Maher did during the actual filming process; in the movie's final edit, he goes right for the jugular.


This movie isn't going to change anyone's mind, as I mentioned earlier. The faithful are going to scream blasphemy, and the atheists are going to say they told us so.


I talk about my feelings concerning God elsewhere in this blog. Look there to see all of that; I don't need to repeat myself.


But one of the main points in this movie is that freedom can be a dangerous thing. Just as godless people have the right to have their views, so do the zealots. And they are inevitably going to clash. We can only hope that doesn't end up dooming our fragile planet.

God Is A Concept

...by which we measure our pain.

John Lennon wrote that about 40 years ago. For many, many years I thought that was pretty cynical. I mean, isn't God supposed to be about Joy and Love and all that groovy stuff?

You have to look into what Lennon was going through when he penned those immortal words. At the time he was facing the loss of his part in the world's most successful musical enterprise, which he helped start in order to get away from an extremely dysfunctional upbringing. If anyone knew pain, it was John Lennon.

John eventually learned that in order to be at peace with God, you need to be at peace with yourself first. (It seemed to work for him; when he re-surfaced from his self-imposed exile with 'Double Fantasy' in 1980, he seemed to be much happier.) I think the Bible says something like that: Let peace begin with me. Look it up. Bibles are easy to find.

There are all sorts of people all over the world who claim to speak for God. They tell you, "God wants this, God wants that, etc." Really? How do you know this for sure? God told you? Oh. Okay. Let's think about that.

I'm about halfway through a book called 'The God Delusion' by the British scientist and author Richard Dawkins. He tries to explain how unlikely it really is that God exists, using the argument that it's pretty darn unlikely that the being that created a universe that we can't even comprehend the limits of is constantly vigilant of our innermost thoughts, dreams, and mortal temptations.

I suspect Dawkins is really saying that the people who actually believe all this unlikeliness have got a short-sighted agenda that they're trying to exert over the rest of us in order to gain some type of authority, or worse yet, control.

Do I think he has a point? Well, yeah. I'll try to explain.

When I went through my divorce, I went through a psychoanalytical regimen that included a thorough period of self-evaluation. The idea was to face the pain so I could deal with it, accept it, and learn and grow from it. This included a stint with Alcoholics/Narcotics Anonymous, which basically works on the same premise. You search, you accept, and you ask God for forgiveness and guidance. The thing I really loved about AA was that their definition of God was left to one's own conception; "however you perceive him to be". I called him God because of my strict Catholic upbringing. Others called him Spirit, or HP (for Higher Power; now when I hear computer people discuss HP I have to chuckle.)

Here's what I learned.

There is a spiritual power within each one of us, a power that we don't understand. A lot of people like to call it God. Dr. M. Scott Peck, in his book "The Road Less Traveled", suggests our unconscious is God. It's worth thinking about, at least. Anyway, this power does all sorts of things for us, many of which are really weird. Things like ESP, communicating with the dead, creating works of art. You could think of all sorts of stuff. In addition to providing us with a moral compass to guide our daily lives, this spirit also heals us.

But you have to work at it; it doesn't just pop up out of the sky one day. The 4th step in AA says to conduct 'a searching and fearless moral inventory'. I will tell you flat out that is probably the hardest thing I have ever done. Pain, serious fucking pain, folks. Lennon was right on.

But you know what? When you finally feel like you really can't take any more and you're so fucking desperate you'll try anything, you go to a meeting (or therapy session) and finally heed the advice you've been hearing so much about and surrender to that spirit so it can heal you. And that is when you begin to understand God. The God you have been looking for is right there within you. And it is absolutely marvelous. It is worth all the trouble.

I am not comfortable putting myself in a position to judge people who claim to be agents of God (I could probably think of a better term, but I think you catch my drift). The Bible, as well as common sense, tells us that's God's job. Well, at least that's a good way of passing that buck.

But I can tell within a short period of time which people are using their God-given strengths for the right reasons.

This is probably a good time to bring in Jesus. When you look at what He taught, you can justify the connection between himself and His Righteous Father. Too bad so many people lose sight of that. Assuming they had sight of that in the first place.

Does God know the innermost depths of your soul? He doesn't need to; you already do. Does God know the answers to all your troubles? He doesn't need to do that, either, for the same reason.

God isn't into guilt, or fear, or emotional manipulation. The part of your soul that houses those things just hasn't had the light shone on it yet. The light you possess. The light you can turn on right now. Stop your whining, stop your bitching, stop your accusing, and get to work on yourself. Because the honest truth is that when you make peace with your own soul, every reason for worrying about what everyone else does flies right out the window.

Is God in heaven? Who knows? Does it matter? Maybe. Too bad we don't find out for sure until it's too late to change it. In fairness to the Heaven People, it probably doesn't hurt us to live a life that will assure us entrance to that glorious afterlife. That would also mean that you are following Jesus' words in the true sense, and loving your neighbor as yourself. No guilt, no fear, no cheating, no violence, no crime. Oh, don't panic. There's still lots of fun to be had. Jesus liked his wine, too. And there's got to be a reason why marijuana grows on this earth (but that's for another time).

Peace.

Professional Creation

When I first started this blog, I did it with the notion that I would finally free myself to write about what I felt was important to me and to my view of the world. That is why I chose to include the little ‘possible objectionable material’ disclaimer that you see whenever you click on the link to get here. (Update: I have since removed this disclaimer.) Seems like a lot of people in this world are scared shitless of controversy – not me, folks. Not any more, anyway.

So after writing some nice clean little stories about some of my escapades, now I feel it’s time to dive in head-first about one of my very favorite topics of all time – sex.

I was a little nervous about just giving this post the title of 'Sex' - makes it sound like that book by Madonna, and you can imagine what I think of all that. Then I thought, "Well, we can call it 'Procreation', which sounds too scientific (and by natural extension not smart-ass enough), or some obscured variation to that: 'Professional Creation', maybe? Or get even weirder and call it 'Confessional Probation'? Wait, that one's got too many other possibilities. Let's go back one step and leave it at this for now." Anyway....

I’ve always had a really strong sex drive. Must run in the family; a lot of my relation is a result of liberal procreation (this phrase could have multiple intended meanings). In this case that means my folks, their brothers and sisters, and many of their ancestors, had boatloads of kids. Lots of rompin’ in the sack. Or wherever they did it in those days. The back of the roadster, perhaps. Good for them. I can only hope it was fun. I'm sure it was, anyway, if only for at least a few seconds.

But nobody explained to me while I was growing up what those wild feelings in my loins meant. At least they never gave me any good explanations. Sex was always dirty, something you didn’t talk about, something you should be ashamed of. What the hell is wrong with you? (That question will be addressed in a future post.)

So that left me to my own devices about how to find out about it. Shopping catalogs, suggestive photos in any print media I could find, whatever. And having a mother that regularly tore her way through everything I owned meant that any of my discoveries were not privately held for any length of time. Oh yeah, Terry, let’s add shame and embarrassment to this whirlwind of emotions you’re trying to cope with. Right fucking on.

So, anyway, when I finally made it out on my own, this search got a little more methodical. Playboy, Penthouse, Hustler, etc., at last started answering some of those lingering questions. Some. But not nearly all.

And the search for more and more knowledge has really been non-stop. Kind of a parallel to the continuing quest for knowledge about everything, you could say.

Hugh Hefner once got taken to task by Mike Wallace on a very old episode of ’60 Minutes’ about why Playboy (seemingly) advocated sex in its pages. Hugh had a very good answer. Playboy, he explained, was a lifestyle magazine, and contemporary lifestyle issues needed to address sexual responsibility. Face it, deal with it, learn how to use it, and grow. Hmmmm. Could this actually be common sense we are addressing?

And that brings me to a major point (one of several, as you are finding out). Sexual knowledge is not only power, it’s confidence. Sexually confident people are also socially responsible people.

My ignorance about sex when I was younger could have been disastrous, just as sexual ignorance has been disastrous for countless numbers of horny folks throughout time. I’m lucky it was only embarrassing. Didn’t feel lucky at the time, but you catch my drift. I think.

I’ve had parents who claim to be wise and successful in their parenting tell me that they don’t think sex education for their little darlings is appropriate. Somehow this notion exists that if you teach your kids about it, it is condoning those actions. Like you're giving them permission to go out and be as promiscuous as they want.

Well, I’ve got news for you folks. Your kids are thinking about it, and are doing it, anyway, and there isn’t a fucking thing you can do to stop that from happening. Go sit in a mall for a while and discreetly catch some of the conversations your kids are having with their friends. You’ll learn all sorts of stuff.

This has to be said: Sexual relations with and between minors are illegal for a reason. I am not advocating it. One of the most important things parents can do is to instruct their kids in what is legal, what is safe, what is smart, and what is responsible.

Yeah, it is embarrassing, because sexual feelings are among one's most private thoughts, and opening that window opens a flood gate of emotions. Which is the way it’s meant to be. Sexuality is indeed closely tied to emotional health.

But how embarrassing is it compared to the public humiliation of having your children proven sexually irresponsible in a court of law, or even in the court of public opinion? If people in your neighborhood or your local school district were to reveal that they knew all about your child’s sexual exploits, even though you’re still personally claiming some type of moral high ground, how would that really make you feel?

Earlier I mentioned sex education. It’s pretty clear to me that sex education in our schools doesn’t even begin to go far enough to address the core issues.

Sex is about (at least) two things: it’s about helping to establish a relationship-building trust between two individuals, and it’s about pleasure.

If society, and by extension our schools, taught that there are several ways to responsibly promote sexual satisfaction, we could absolutely wipe out unplanned pregnancy, sexually transmitted diseases, and all that goes with them. Teach kids about erogenous zones. Teach them about how to satisfy their partner without actual 'pro-creational' intercourse. Teach them how to talk (and listen) to each other about what they like and what they want. It’s not only possible, it’s preferable, and it is really, really enjoyable. Trust me.

Face it – we all want to get our rocks off once in a while. It’s therapeutic; it feels good. There are too many people trying to control our lives who don’t do that, and you can tell right away who they are. Some of the most uptight (and dangerous) people I see are the abstinence-only advocates. I’ve witnessed the dangers of that type of denial first-hand. It is playing with fire.

So take sex for what it is – it’s natural, and it is pleasurable. But it is also something that you need to be smart about. Read, study, and talk (and listen), as much as you can. You’ll thank yourself, and each other (to paraphrase Jerry Springer). ;-)